The Ask That Becomes Something You Wear
I’ve been thinking about my friend Josephine Bergsøe lately, not in a big, sweeping way, but in the kind of quiet way that stays with you long after a moment has passed.
Josephine is an artist in Copenhagen but more importantly she is a great friend. We spent time in Copenhagen this past Christmas(which was pure magic). The city has a way of slowing everything down without asking you to. The light is softer, conversations stretch a little longer, and you find yourself noticing things you normally move right past.
There’s something about it you don’t really talk about, but you feel it. Josephine lives in that rhythm, and her work does too. Josephine is an established jeweler and has some of the most beautiful pieces I have ever seen.
If you’ve ever seen it, you know immediately. It doesn’t feel overdesigned or overly polished. It feels discovered. Gold that doesn’t try to be perfect, stones that look like they ended up exactly where they were meant to be, pieces that feel like they existed long before they ever found you.
What I’ve come to deeply appreciate, especially after years of friendship (more on that below), is that her work isn’t solely about how beautiful something looks. It’s also about where it came from, how it came to be, and the unspoken meaning behind each piece. Each piece tells a story.
Josephine is classically trained as a goldsmith, but she doesn’t work in a traditional way. She doesn’t sketch something perfectly and then execute it. She lets the materials lead. She lets the personal stories behind the pieces inspire her creativity. Raw diamonds, baroque pearls, stones most people might overlook. She studies them, sits with them, and lets the piece reveal itself over time.
There’s a patience to it. A willingness to not rush to the outcome and that’s why her pieces feel the way they do. They aren’t forced into perfection. They are designed and created from pure heart, exceptional talent, and the type of craftsmanship you don’t often find.
She cares deeply about what her pieces represent. Not just what they’re worth, but what they mean to the person wearing them.
What’s this got to do with persuasion? Let me tell you a story.
Alvin and I got engaged in Paris, and it was exactly what you would hope it would be.
Naturally, that led us to go looking for our rings. We found ourselves in some of the most beautiful shops in the world, surrounded by rings that were undeniably stunning. And they were. Truly. However, we didn’t find anything that “spoke to us” or truly represented who we are.
And then we somehow wandered into a small, tucked away shop in a quaint Parisian courtyard. There it was. Our rings. It was love at first sight. Everything around it seemed to fade away.
Not Cartier. Not Tiffany & Co. Not Hermes. Not a commercial design line we had ever heard about.
The tag said “Josephine Bergsøe”. At the time, we had no idea who she was, but we knew those rings were meant for us.
That could have been the end of the story. A perfect moment, a perfect find, something we carry with us and always remember. But I couldn’t leave it there. Once we got back from that trip, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to unfold from this coincidental (serendipitous) moment.
I needed to know more.
I spent a few days digging, and what some may call stalking. It paid off, I found her! The seemingly elusive Josephine. I reached out, introduced myself, shared our story, and then asked a simple question. One that could have easily gone unanswered, “Would yoube willing to create more for us?”
That one ask turned into something I never could have planned.
Bracelets. Cuff links for our wedding. Pieces that carry the same feeling as those original rings. And eventually, pieces she had never created for anyone else. Ones she admitted had pushed her out of her comfort zone, but in a way she was grateful for.
Knowing what I know now about how she works, her methodical and somewhat intentional creative process, it means much more than I realized at the time.
Josephine doesn’t just make things. She chooses them. The materials, the process, and in many ways, the people. Not in an exclusive way, but in a thoughtful way. The same way her pieces come to life - slowly, intentionally, without forcing them into something they’re not meant to be.
From that moment on, we became what I like to call “modern day pen pals.”
Monthly emails, photos shared and stories exchanged. This past Christmas, we finally did something we had thought about since that very first message. We flew to Copenhagen to meet her and her partner, Morten.
It was immediately easy and comfortable, as if we had known each other for years and were just picking up where we left off.
What started as a ring became a collection. What became a collection turned into a friendship. And now, something far more meaningful than anything we could have ever predicted.
A bond that just feels easy. You know, the kind you don’t question and know isn’t going anywhere.
I’ve always talked about persuasion in terms of outcomes, the ask, the yes, the result. But this is something quieter.
Remember…none of it just “happens”. Not the casual stroll through an unassuming Parisian courtyard. Not the rings. Not the collection.Not the friendship or spiritual connection. Had that moment remained merely a thought rather than a simple e-mail with an ask, our paths would never have crossed.
How many things in our lives are sitting right on the edge of existing, just waiting for us to decide if we’re willing to make the ask?
Not perfectly. Not with some big plan. Just asking.
Our wedding rings feel like they were always meant to be ours.
They started in a small shop we were lucky enough to find, a question I chose to ask, and somehow that turned into something we now carry with us every day.
That’s the version of persuasion I keep coming back to. Not the kind that pushes, but the kind that opens. The kind that feels organic.
Let me ask you this: How often are the most meaningful things just sitting on the other side of an ask we haven’t yet had the courage to act upon?
For more information on Josephine, please visit https://bergsoe.dk
